Fixation (Magnetic Desires Book 3) Read online

  "Nothing I can't handle." I gestured at the chair in the corner. "Will you sit?"

  The chair scraped across the floor as he pulled it closer to the bed and sat, inspecting his nails. "Mellie never told me she had a twin."

  "How is she?" I asked, ravenous for news of the family I’d left behind.

  He shifted in his seat. "She’s good."

  "Good." I echoed. Despite how I’d tried to shut her out of my mind, to forget about her the way I did our parents, there was a bond between us that made me ache to see her even after all these years. "What is she doing with herself? Did she end up becoming a doctor?"

  Leaning forward, he placed his hands on his knees, a slight frown marring his handsome features. "She was going to be a doctor?"

  I dipped my chin in a half nod. "She was going to follow in our father’s footsteps."

  "She’s not really the type." He snickered.

  "Then what? Is she married? Does she have kids?"

  "No, not our Mellie. She’s as independent as they get." His voice was low, soft, and held a note of something that twined with the ache in my chest.

  "I haven’t seen you before." Buzz cut and kind eyes aside, the man was toned and calloused; the kind of man who worked with his hands. "Do you live here, in Lanston?" My brain sparked. "Does Mellie live here, too?" How could I have lived in the same city as my sister and not known. Dizziness made my vision blurry, and I closed my eyes, resting my head in my palms.

  "No." He fluffed the pillow and helped me lay back. "She’s in Reverence."

  "Reverence?" I echoed as though that name should ring a bell but didn’t quite dint the blanket of forgotten places.

  "It’s about seven hours from here." He shrugged and leaned back in his chair.

  "So, why are you here?"

  "I see a specialist out here. Now, does Mellie’s identical twin sister have a name?”

  "It’s Lola, and I ran away from home when I was fifteen." The part of me that would always feel guilty at having left Mellie tugged at me. "I was the black sheep. I was nothing but heartbreak to my parents. They… didn’t want me around, so I left."

  He reached out to pat my arm, and I glanced up to see sympathy in his eyes. “I understand. I know a little about your parents from Mellie. She hasn’t talked to your father in years.”

  "What?" I pulled my hand back from his. “My straight-A, never interested in boys sister doesn’t talk to our parents? She was the good one.”

  His face trembled and cracked into a grin that rolled over his features like thunder. “Oh, I think she could give you a run for your money, but it’s a long story.” One that would probably be better coming from her.”

  "In case you haven’t noticed I’m stuck in a hospital bed, so I have time." I shifted to get comfortable.

  “It would probably be better if I let her tell it.” There was silence for a minute while he shuffled in his seat. "What happened to you?"

  I winced. "I got entangled in the wrong crowd. It’s all right now. He’s dead."

  The words were not so much for him as they were for myself. When I was awake, Brady was dead and my life was my own, but when I fell asleep, he came at me snarling, with that knife in his hand. It would be a long time before he was out of my life completely. My eyes slipped shut, and I mumbled, "Will you still be here when I wake up?"

  ***

  "Mommy, Mommy," Tia chanted as she climbed onto the end of the bed.

  I gazed at my daughter. Every day I had spent in this hospital was worth it to know I had the chance to give her the life she deserved. "Come snuggle, baby."

  Maggie stood at the foot of the bed, and I glanced at Mike still sitting in the chair beside me. "You’re still here?"

  He cleared his throat while Tia settled herself on my good side, but Maggie was the one to speak. "You have a chance for a fresh start, and your sister is in Reverence. Mike and I talked about it while you were sleeping. You’re going back with him."

  I opened my mouth and shut it again as I glanced at the two of them. For the first time in my life, I didn’t have to do what someone else told me to. My decisions were my own. The fact that they had decided for me and Tia that I should go with a man whose only connection to me was my twin sister should have made me angry, but it didn’t. I hugged Tia as tight as I could without hurting my ribs. A bubble of warmth enveloped me at the idea of going to see my sister. She hadn't deserved my desertion, and I missed her more than I'd been willing to admit while my life wasn't my own. Hearing Mike talk about my sister had sharpened that loss, but I could change that now. Lanston held few good memories, and I was ready to move on.

  The silence between the three of us was palpable as they darted glances at each other in worry. I beamed at them both. "Okay, when do we go?"

  Maggie beamed and Mike relaxed into his seat. "Once you’re released, I’ll take you home."

  ***

  The house Mike pulled up in front of was huge. No, not huge, but certainly bigger than any I'd lived in since I left home. I'd gone from an apartment I shared with six of Brady's girls to the tiny two-bedroom box where I’d lived with Tia. Some of those girls had been my friends, but I’d wanted to keep Tia as far away from Brady’s world as possible. Even if I'd been unable to change my circumstances, I wouldn't allow my daughter to suffer them.

  A sensor light flickered on, casting a glow over part of a wide wrap around porch and outlining the length of the house. Tucking my hands into the crooks of my elbows, I shivered. "This is your house?"

  Mike glanced at me as he parked the truck in the garage. "I built it myself."

  "It’s…"

  "Too big for a bachelor pad," he offered, gazing through the windscreen. "You can stay here for as long as you need, though I’d guess Mellie will want you staying with her."

  "She probably won’t want to see me."

  "Of course she will." He smiled and jumped out of the truck to gather Tia from the backseat.

  She stirred, and then laid her head on his shoulder as he led us into the house. Putting her down on the gray suede sectional in the living room, he pulled a throw over her while I gazed around. The idea of tossing my arms up and spinning around the white-walled living room like Julie Andrews in A sound of Music was almost too much to ignore. Instead I plunked my bag down on the massive granite coffee table that filled the space in front of the sectional and bent to kiss my baby goodnight. Tears burned behind my eyes at finding ourselves in a place like this after what we’d lived with for so long.

  A glance at Mike confirmed his pride, in the way he stood feet apart, chest puffed up behind crossed arms, and a smirk that said he was thoroughly enjoying my reaction. "Thank you for letting us stay here. Your house is amazing."

  "I had an interior designer do it. Now, there’s a guest room down here you can take for tonight." He led me further into the house and flipped on the light in the bedroom. "I’ll call Mellie in the morning."

  "Thank you," I called at his retreating form.

  Exhausted, I turned out the light and crossed to the queen-sized bed, sinking down onto the plush mattress fully clothed. I told myself I'd get changed in a minute. That I'd find my pajamas and my toothbrush and be worthy of the comfort surrounding me, but my eyes fluttered shut. I’d only had a single bed for years, so this was heaven. Pulling the covers over me, I lay on the diagonal. My last stray thought was how long it would take me to squish up on one side of the bed.

  ***

  Clanging and voices in the house pulled me from the best night's sleep I might have ever had. Climbing out of bed, I took the time to find my toothbrush and get dressed before I wandered out to find Tia sitting on a stool at the counter, eating pancakes. On the other side of the counter, Mike tossed a pancake high in the air and flipped it back into the pan. Beside him, drinking juice as if this was a regular occurrence, was my sister. I stared at her from the doorway. The difference between us had been purely personality, but I had forgotten what it was like to stare at my mirror ima
ge and know it was another person, or the way I could feel her emotions as she put the glass down and skirted the counter to stand in front of me.

  I rubbed my arm as she took in my appearance, her gaze narrowed and her mouth set in a hard line. A retreating step found my back against the wall.

  "You look… like hell." She reached out and pulled me in.

  Wrapping my arms around her, tears flowed freely in the joy of the moment. It would take time to close the wounds of the past. Her steeliness told me she hadn't forgiven me yet, but she was willing to welcome me back anyway. I pressed my face to her shoulder while Mike moved to stand beside Tia, giving us a moment. It had been a long time since I had been where I was meant to be. Coming to Reverence was coming home, and I desperately needed that.

  Even when Mellie pulled away, she kept hold of my hand and we crossed to Tia and Mike.

  I leaned down to kiss my daughter’s cheek, glad that she was no longer growing up under the shadow of her mother’s bad decisions. No matter how far I had run, it comforted me that my mistakes hadn't left her without family.

  Mellie poured more juice for everyone and settled on a stool beside Tia. She glanced up at me as she put her arm around her niece. "So you’re my niece, and do you know what that means?"

  Tia gazed at her and frowned. "No."

  Mellie chuckled. "I get to spoil you rotten."

  Tia bounced up and down on her stool as Mellie filled her in on all the fun things they would do together, occasionally stopping to glance at me and make sure it was okay she was excited. I smiled at her and went to stand beside Mike. "Thank you."

  He turned his head, pitching his voice low so that only I could hear him. "I would do anything for Mellie’s sister."

  I glanced from him to Mellie and back again. My chest ached. Tia’s father had once said he’d do anything for me, but that was before we'd been ripped apart. I hadn't even known I was pregnant when Brady came for me. For a time that had been a blessing. If I'd known when Brady stole me back he would have taken her from me. Still I'd ached for having that joy robbed from me, from us. The week I'd spent as Leo's wife I'd learned so much about him as a man. He'd wanted a family, and kids. Three or four he'd told me. Even though Tia had been an oops, he would have been delighted.

  I wondered if he still thought of me, still looked for me. How hard it must have been on him to come back that day and find me gone. He would have searched. I shut my eyes and rubbed my temples. Yes, he would have searched every damn strip club in Lanston before he realized it was never going to be that easy to get me back.

  I'd been a sick, twisted game to Brady, only I hadn't known it until it was too late. The other girls he'd let go when they paid out their debts, but that had never been what he wanted from me. I swayed, my hands gripping tightly to the edge of the counter, and Mike slipped an arm around my shoulder. "You okay, Lola? Are you feeling alright?"

  Startled, I opened my eyes to see his worried gaze on me. "Yeah." Brady's gone. "I'm okay now."

  For six long years I'd wished for Leo. To feel his arms around me and tell him that I'd never forgotten him. Once we were settled, I would find him and tell him he had a daughter.

  Chapter Three

  Six months later

  Leo

  My footsteps echoed on the polished concrete floors as I traversed the gallery floor. I’d built this place with my own blood and sweat. Large skylights filtered natural light into the space. It bounced off the gray-white walls, giving the area a modern elegance, which complemented the monochromatic and intense colors of the works hanging on each wall. Stalking past them, I headed for the main display wall.

  I shoved my fists in my pockets and stared at the painting José had given me the last time I’d been in San Juan. It had represented so much back then, and though the colors were still as fresh as they had been all those years ago, and the painting in its own right was José’s masterpiece, it held nothing but memories I no longer wanted to indulge in.

  Even before the painting had arrived at the gallery, she’d left me. The day the collection came in, I’d unpacked each box, knowing at some point I was going to open the one with her painting inside. She’d adored San Juan, and for those two weeks on the cruise, and the week we'd spent together afterwards we'd existed in a bubble of our own making. I’d thought she’d loved me. I’d been an idiot to think she wanted more from me than the money she took when she vanished.

  Still, it had taken me far too long to realize she wasn’t going to change her mind. I’d put José’s painting on the main wall, hoping that somehow she would change her mind and come back to me. For those first six months, I would have forgiven her for taking off. How many times had I stood in front of this painting, turning each time the door opened, and praying to catch a glimpse of her?

  Almost six years I’d let this painting take up prime real estate, because after those first few months I stopped turning at the sound of footsteps, and started clenching my jaw instead. I’d left it there as a reminder that I would not be made a fool again.

  I glanced over to where my assistant sat at her desk flipping through art magazines in between clients. "The damn painting has to go, Alex."

  Alex trotted over on those pointy studded shoes of hers and smoothed her palms over her leather skirt. "You want to get rid of the streetscape?"

  I turned to stare at it. "It’s about time, don’t you think?"

  She patted my arm. "If that’s what you want, Leo."

  Drawing a deep breath, I mulled it over. "Yeah, let's find a buyer."

  Her shoes clipped on the gallery floor as she returned to her desk, and I made my way to the stairs that led up to my second floor office. The wall-sized photograph at the base of the stairs mocked me as I bolted past it, despite my squinting in an effort to avoid it. She and I locked in an embrace that fooled people into believing we were in love. At least when clients brought up how much we must have adored each other, it helped ease the pain. I wasn’t the only one she deceived.

  "One thing at a time," I muttered as I ran up the stairs. Eventually, I would be ready to deal with it, to get rid of it, but not yet. Stalking into my office, I passed the door to the darkroom and went to the closet where I kept my equipment. My brother had gotten engaged a couple of weeks ago and he’d asked me to take photos at their engagement party. Pulling out my camera and the lenses I planned to use for shooting this weekend, I checked the equipment.

  I didn’t relish it. Being surrounded by people celebrating love wasn’t my thing, but I couldn’t turn him down. Since he’d come back home and settled down with Birdie in Reverence, he’d let go of the past that had almost destroyed him. That was what motivated me to sell the painting downstairs.

  Too many years I’d been angry over how she left me. So angry I refused to think or speak Lola’s name. I thumped my camera bag down on the desk. Shit. Unzipping the bag, I pulled out the Canon and checked for damage. My hands trembled with the surge of adrenaline that came with the bristling anger. It had been almost six years and the thought of strangling her still forced itself on me. But, it was time to let go of her and the anger that made even my family tread carefully around me. Packing the camera back into its bag, I snagged the envelope that had come from my lawyer that morning and slid it in the side pocket. I'd put off getting a divorce for so long because I'd been terrified of forgetting what a mistake getting married had been. It had been a safeguard against any real relationship I might have considered, but if I was going to put her behind me, it was time to take the step. Hoisting the strap over my shoulder, I descended to the gallery floor.

  "I’ll see you on Monday," I called out to Alex, who held the phone between her shoulder and ear while she pulled one of the many pens from the bun on her head and waved it in the air like a baton. I didn't understand it, but she claimed it ensured she always had one at the ready.

  "Have a good weekend, Leo. Do you want me to call you when I find a buyer?"

  I paused on the threshold. "Yeah, I
want to handle this sale myself."

  The glass door closed behind me, and I merged with the foot traffic, loosening my tie as I made my way down the block to the cafe. The crowd of people around me dispersed when I reached the corner. Lights changed, and cars turned down the street but in that split second where all traffic had stopped, the girl I never thought I’d see again filled my vision. She stood on the other side of the road, the sun hitting her blonde hair, giving it a copper shine as she played with the braid that hung over her shoulder. Her gaze caught mine, and those blue eyes that changed with her mood peered right into me. I held her locked into my stare as her lips parted and she fluttered a hand to her throat. My heart froze in my chest, and I forgot to breathe.

  Before I could stop myself, I had one foot on the blacktop and some kid was squeezing my shoulder, hauling me back onto the curb. "Man, have you got a death wish?"

  I turned to face the kid, holding his skateboard under his arm and a beanie planted firmly over his dreads, as a car took the corner sharply and drove straight over the path I'd been taking.

  "Thanks. I mustn’t have been paying attention," I mumbled. All I wanted to do was shift my gaze back to her.

  The kid shrugged and dropped his skateboard before riding across the intersection with the light change, and I turned my attention back to the other side of the street.

  But she wasn’t there. Had I imagined her? I scrubbed a hand over my eyes and looked again. It had been a long week and I’d been thinking about her and that damn painting, that was all. She wouldn’t show up here, now, not after all this time.

  Lola had run out on me within a week of marrying me. The first day after the two-week cruise we'd met on, we'd spent at the courthouse hand in hand, waiting to get married. She'd worn a simple gray cocktail dress and I'd donned one of my suits. One week later she'd taken my money, and left her rings with a note that told me she'd never planned on staying. I hadn't believed it. I'd torn out of the hotel, and searched the streets for her. Then I'd taken a cab to the seedier part of town, my heart galloping while the driver took his sweet-assed time. I went into more strip joints in that one trip than I'd been to in my life, but she'd vanished.