Fixation (Magnetic Desires Book 3) Page 16

  "Please, sweetheart."

  It was the sweet murmur of his lips against my belly more than the words themselves that tore me open and gave me voice. "He took me somewhere. I don’t know. He gagged me, covered my head as soon as we were in the car. I don’t know how long he kept me like that. After the car, I was left in a room." I shook my head, trying to forget the cold concrete floor and the sound of water dripping. "When he came back for me, he removed the bag." There was no need to admit that it had been days and I’d been left without food, water, or a toilet. "His face…"

  I squeezed my eyes shut; trying to concentrate on the darkness of my eyelids and not Brady’s leer as he lifted the bag and then led me from the room.

  Leo’s arms moved to my waist, holding on to me like a drowning man. Wet drops dripped onto my belly and slid over my pubis. He didn’t need to tell me to go on. He needed to know more than I needed to forget.

  "He told me he’d teach me a lesson, one that would keep me in my place from then on. We were standing outside in the dark, the high beams on his car the only light as far as I could see." I sucked in a breath. "He used me as a punching bag, until I was down. Then he used his boots. Three broken ribs, broken nose, wrist, and the base of my skull split open." Another breath. "The leg. He used a hammer."

  "Fuck." Leo’s breath hissed from him as his fingers tightened on my skin.

  "I was lucky. I didn’t know I was pregnant."

  There was silence other than the sound of our harsh breathing. I waited for the slow easy breaths that would signal Leo had calmed down. That he’d let go of the anger over what had happened and accepted that we’d been lucky. Long minutes passed before he spoke. "Damn it, Lola. I should have kept scouring Lanston searching for you. I shouldn’t have left you there. The only reason I did was because part of me believed you would come back to me, that you would find your way home." He shook his head frantically.

  "I know that." Running my hands through his hair, I wanted to ease his pain.

  "I put the streetscape in the front window, so if you came, you would see it and know I still wanted you."

  "And I saw it, Leo, when I came to find you, but it’s too late."

  "No." He growled and gazed up at me.

  "We’re too different now. We can’t go back to what we had."

  "We’re not—"

  "We’ve changed. We’re not the same people and it’s too dangerous to try and fool ourselves."

  He stood up, pulling me against him. "We can find our way back."

  "No." I shook my head to back up my words. "We could end up hating each other."

  "I could never hate you."

  "But you did, Leo. You can’t tell me you didn’t hate me."

  His embrace tightened around me, fighting to hold on when I was asking him to let me go. Maybe I couldn't stop loving him, but was that enough to take a chance on our daughter's happiness and risk being hurt again? "We’re good now. Friends. That’s what she needs."

  "What about you? What do you need?" he rumbled, the intensity of him reminding me why we’d entered the room in the first place.

  "I need…" I clenched my thighs together. "One night, Leo. One, and then we let it lie. Just tonight, and then we concentrate on her."

  "One night." He raised an eyebrow in question. "Do you think that will be enough?"

  "It will be." I nodded and tilted my face to his. It has to be.

  "Okay, tonight, then." The corner of his mouth twitched and his eyes crinkled as he trailed his finger over my throat. "Just know that when you change your mind, all you have to do is ask."

  "I won’t." If only I could be more certain.

  He turned me in his arms and tentatively touched the nape of my neck. "So there’s a scar here?"

  I nodded and he pressed his lips to the spot. "Do they bother you?"

  "Sometimes," I admitted. "They aren’t pretty, but they remind me I’m strong and that I’m a survivor."

  "You’re more than that, Lolly. You’re a fighter."

  "Maybe."

  He undid my bra and stroked his hands over my arms, pushing the straps down until it fell to the floor. "You are the strongest woman I know."

  Ready to leave the topic behind, I snorted nervously. "You still talk too much."

  "You need to learn to take a compliment." I could feel him moving behind me as he removed his T-shirt.

  He dropped it to the floor in front of me, and it occurred to me this was a first since we’d been back in each other's lives. I wanted to spin around and place my hands on his bare chest. Needed to feel the heat of him beneath my palms as I explored his body in a way his anger had kept me from being able to.

  "Uh-uh." Grasping my waist, he held me trapped. "We have all night. Don’t rush it, sweetheart. Let me satisfy you the way you should be."

  He didn’t tack on every night, but he didn’t have to. It was in the connection between us. What he wanted, what he’d always wanted, even when he’d been too angry to admit it. I should have reveled in the victory. But what good was it when I couldn’t let us go down that road? With care that belied his strength and the passion inside him, he pulled me against him. The hard heat of his muscular torso soaked into my back and I relaxed into him, my head resting on his shoulder. Holding me there, his chin nestled in my hair, one arm across my chest beneath my breasts, the other skimmed my belly to nestle over my slit. His erection pressed against my ass through his jeans and I wiggled, wanting to feel more. "Leo, I want you."

  Nudging my head to the side with his cheek, he kissed my shoulder. "I know, but I want to make this last. You always were an impatient one."

  He flicked his finger over my clit, spiking the ache inside me, and my breath whistled between my teeth as I thrust into his hand. I could feel the curve of his lips against my shoulder while he cupped my breast, sliding my nipple between two fingers and pinching the bud until it peaked. Shutting my eyes, I wallowed in the sensations he lifted from me. I was a needy mess of desire and his fingertips slid through my wetness, pushing inside. My knees buckled, bringing my pussy firmly into his hand, and pulling him deeper into my channel. Rubbing against his palm, needing the friction, I wanted the release that would come with it. A whimper froze in my throat as I edged closer to orgasm but couldn’t quite reach it. It would take little more than his finger dancing over my clit to set me off but I wanted more. Deep inside my core, the ache for him grew. I wanted his cock, his hardness pushing against my inner walls, stretching and filling me so when I came, it would be world shaking and satisfying.

  Leo had other plans. Hooking his fingers inside me, he increased the pressure where I needed it until I cried out, my orgasm ripping through me and stealing my breath.

  He chuckled near my ear as I came down. "Are you satisfied?"

  "Hardly." Spinning in his arms, I didn't give him a chance to catch me before I pressed myself to his chest. His grin fell, his gaze locked on where my tits rested against him. I’d moved too quickly to fully register the glimpse of worry that shadowed his eyes while I rose on tiptoe to drag his mouth down to mine. Thrusting my tongue into his mouth, I drew him down to me. Tangled together, each of us took what we needed. The faint scent of chocolate, black currants, and sandalwood, mingled with the sweet taste of him, and I pressed myself against the hard angles of his body when he dipped me back.

  Breaking away, I ran my gaze over his torso while I fumbled with his belt. The tattoos I remembered were supplemented with more. Pressing my palm to his chest, he covered it with his own, while I pulled the belt from his pants with the other. I traced my hand over the enso on his left pectoral. "Still haven’t finished the journey?"

  "I don’t think I ever will."

  I moved my gaze along with my free hand down the left side of his body. Some of it faded, some new. A tree of life took up the space between his ribs and the V of his hips. Thick black lines that resembled birds spread from the top of it to the enso. Walking my fingers over the cut ridges of his six-pack to the othe
r side, I worked my way up the trail of yellow roses and photography film to the girl who had wrecked him before me. I pressed my lips together. We’d never talked about what his friend had told me while we’d been on the cruise in the tropics. Wondering why I hadn't made the canvas, I tried not to be jealous. For a man who’d wanted to be reminded it seemed out of character. "Where’s mine?"

  He exhaled, his chest rising and falling beneath our hands, and he inched my palm to the side. My name, a flourish across his heart. Shit. My fingers prickled as I ran them over the ink. It was almost as if I owned his heart. Lips parted, I darted my tongue out to wet them. Surely this was only him reminding himself, but what if it wasn't? "Why did you get this, Leo?"

  "Does it matter?"

  Drawing my brow together, I gnawed at the inside of my lip. It might. "I guess not, but I need to know."

  "I’ll tell you, but not tonight." Cupping my ass, he fitted me snugly against him. "Unless of course you want to forget about…"

  The length of him against my belly was enough to remind me what we were doing, but I wanted the answer to my question. Still, I decided it could wait when he sunk to his knees in front of me again, blazing a trail with his mouth, his tongue flicking from my belly to the inside of my thigh. His breath heated my cooling skin, reigniting my dampened desire.

  He did this to me. This hit to my senses that never left me sated for long. The need for more like it was oxygen, like I was starving for him. I gasped and gripped his shoulders as his tongue darted inside my slit. An instant rush of wetness added to the slide of his tongue over my sensitive flesh and I shivered as he delved into my core over and over, intermittently pulling back to lap at my clit. Whimpering under his skilled attack, each move he made filled me with the need for more. My hips bucked, and he pulled me into his mouth, his hands on my ass pushing me firmly against him.

  "God, Leo." I was so close to exploding.

  My body caught fire when he mumbled something against my pussy and sucked the ball of nerves, clamping down on it with his teeth. My knees collapsed under me. Only his hands and his mouth kept me upright while I came on his face. He held me there, until I loosened the grip on his shoulders and regained my balance. I worked on breathing, remembering how to pull oxygen into my lungs, to inhale and exhale while he got to his feet, the grin I remembered so affectionately splitting his face.

  "Your taste is addictive, sweetheart." Coiling a tendril of my hair around his finger, his gaze locked with mine and he tugged me in for a kiss. His beard moist with my arousal, his tongue stroking mine covered in my taste.

  I was done with this dance we were doing. Three orgasms and not once had his cock been inside me. The craving for him to fuck me was all consuming. I tugged at his jeans, heard the pop of the snap give way, and reefed them down. His erection outlined by tight boxer briefs made my mouth water, until it was wet as my thighs. The thin cotton between us was no match for my fixation. Dragging them down, I reached for him and stroked the thick length. Hips rolling, he jerked in my hand and groaned low in his throat.

  "This is what I need, Leo. I need you to fuck me. I need your wildness, your lack of control, your dominance."

  "My dominance?" He growled. "You want me to fuck you like I did on my desk?"

  "Yes," I whimpered. The thought of how he’d taken what he wanted without care had my insides clenching. "Yes."

  Grabbing my hair, he wrapped it around his fist and yanked my head back to crush his mouth on mine. His kiss was all teeth and tongue, savage and passionate, and I trembled as that latent desire inside me uncoiled once again. The wall met my back before I was even aware we were moving, his other arm wrapping around me to pull me up and guide a leg around his waist. His cock nudged at my slit, a groan escaping our mouths, his or mine, I couldn’t be sure. Tangling my fingers in his hair, I kept his mouth pressed to mine while he pushed straight into my aching pussy. An eruption of tingles speared through me as he lifted and plunged into me, skin against skin, his arousal and mine combined.

  "Shit. I don’t have a condom." One hand shuffled through his pockets while the other held me to the wall. "We should stop."

  "Fuck, no. We haven't the last two times." Pulling at his hair, I lifted myself up and down on his cock. "On the pill."

  "Thank fuck, sweetheart. Don't think I could have beared it if you’d told me to stop."

  It hadn’t bothered him when we'd come together again initially, but that he’d taken the moment to ask me if I wanted to stop marked the return of a consideration we hadn’t had for each other before.

  Sweat coated our skin as we thrashed together against the wall, needing to take our release from each other. Heavy panting filled the air between us. "Don’t stop, Leo, don’t stop. Don’t ever fucking stop." My high-pitched scream filled the space between us as he slammed into me over and over.

  "You’re so fucking wet." The sound of our bodies moving together was loud in the quiet house, but I didn’t care, couldn’t stop while he filled my craving, bringing me closer to satisfaction, bringing me closer to the release that would help me keep my distance from him in the days to come. The ache in my core expanded, filling me, curling my toes, and sending spasms through my legs as it became too much, my orgasm detonated inside me, an explosive chain reaction that had me calling out his name, and God's, while he fucked me until I could no longer see straight. Until I became too sensitive to the feel of him inside me. He nipped at my lower lip as he slammed into me a final time and followed me with his own release.

  We stayed against the wall, his weight pressed into me, and his hands either side of my head while our breathing steadied and slowed. Only then did he pull out, his cum coating my thighs. "Are you satisfied?"

  I nodded, not sure what to say, or what time it was, or what to do next. Cupping my face between his hands, he brushed his lips over mine. "You want me to go?"

  I wanted him to stay. It would be so easy to settle in his arms and never leave them. "I think you should."

  Pain laced his features for the briefest of seconds before he let go of me and pulled up his pants. He picked up his shirt and with his back turned said, "Next time you’ll ask me to stay."

  And the thing was, I knew he was right. I knew it deep down in the darkest spots in my soul, because only he resided there. "There won’t be a next time, Leo."

  "You don’t believe that." Coming back to me, he stroked my cheek with his knuckles.

  The sound of sobbing infiltrated the intense silence, while I scrambled for an answer, followed by a scream, and I yanked my sweatshirt on before reefing open the door. Leo followed closely behind as I crossed to Tia’s room.

  "It’s okay, princess. It’s only a nightmare." Taking a seat on the edge of the bed, I held her until she woke enough to let go of the dream that had scared her.

  Leo leaned in the doorway watching us. I didn’t need to give him the answer as to why I wouldn’t pursue anything with him. He’d known before we went into that room. "I think you better go."

  He frowned, his shoulders sagging, but he nodded and turned, his feet dragging and the stairs creaking as he made his way out. I hugged Tia a little closer. I was doing the right thing, so why did it feel like such a damn battle?

  "Can I have a drink, Mommy?" Tia squeaked and rubbed at her eyes.

  "Sure, princess, I’ll get you one." I settled her down and made my way downstairs. The rumble of his bike momentarily pierced the quiet, before it disappeared into the distance and the silence seemed even thicker than it had before he left. Maybe it would have been easier if he’d kept on hating me, even a little bit. Filling a glass from the faucet, I headed back upstairs to give Tia her drink before going back to my empty bed. I tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable. I'd convinced myself that sleeping alone was the right thing to do, but in the depths of night I couldn't help but wish Leo's warm body was wrapped around mine.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Leo

  A week ago, I’d thought I’d gotten under Lol
a’s skin. I’d pushed her and she’d responded the way I’d hoped she would. It had been an intense night as we laid out the past and found satisfaction in each other's arms, but she hadn’t let me stay. And since that night, she’d been careful to not give me another opportunity. Fumbling through the folder at the back of the letter file with agitated fingers, I darted glances to the stairs in case she came down from her shower. The envelope was still there, the top torn open, the papers resting in front of it. Quickly, I flipped through the pages. There wasn’t much. A fairly simple divorce outline compared to the one I’d shredded weeks ago. While I'd wanted to protect my assets from the money hungry con artist I'd convinced myself she was, she wanted nothing from me, other than to let her go.

  But the signature lines remained blank. Perhaps her sister was behind this. Mellie certainly couldn't stand me and took every opportunity to remind me that I was an asshole.

  I shoved them back where I’d found them when I heard her footsteps thudding on the stairs. It niggled at me that even if she hadn't been the one to initiate the papers, she still had them. Was she considering signing them? How long did I have before she signed me out of her life?

  "Thanks for staying while I got cleaned up." Lola braided her hair loosely over her shoulder.

  I wanted to tangle my fingers through it, pull her against me, and use my mouth on her skin to convince her to rip up those papers. Instead, I shoved my hands in my pockets and shrugged. "No problem."

  "Say goodbye to your father, Tia." Lola nudged our daughter.

  Tia looked up from her drawing. "Bye, Daddy. I’ll see you tomorrow."

  "Yeah, tomorrow." I gave her a quick hug, careful not to let her note the tension in my arms. For a five year old, she was perceptive, but she didn’t need to know how tentative the relationship between her parents was. "Love you, princess."