Fixation (Magnetic Desires Book 3) Page 17

  I stalked out of the house and across to my bike. All Lola had to do was ask me to stay and I’d never let her go again. More than that, I wanted to pack my girls up and take them home. If she said the word, I’d have her moved in the blink of the eye.

  I couldn’t hate Mike. I owed him more than most, but she didn’t belong with him. She belonged with me, always had, even when all I’d wanted to do was throw her ass up in the air and take my belt to her, I’d known that. It was what had kept me from forcing her to leave and it was what had kept me from physically hurting her when my anger got too much, except for the night I’d tried to say goodbye.

  The bike’s motor screamed out my frustration as I hit open road. No matter how I’d tried to convince my mind that we were better off apart, it didn’t hold, not when my soul recognized her as mine. If only that night hadn’t ended so brutally. If only I hadn’t been so focused on wanting her out of my life, I would have seen that it wasn’t what I wanted at all. That my gut instinct was to believe what she told me. I’d fought her because I hadn’t wanted to hurt at her hands again.

  Oh the irony. Not only had I hurt her hands, but now, she was the one who wasn’t willing to take a chance. We’d had six years of a marriage where we’d spent far more time apart than together, yet neither of us had actively sought to end it. So why, after all that, was she still holding onto the papers that would leave her free of me?

  I pulled into the car park of the local hangout, Blazer’s and stormed inside. As soon as Tia’s bedtime had passed, I would go back over there and get the answers I needed. We’d wasted enough time, and I wasn’t going to waste any more.

  The bar was unpopulated at this time of night and I thumped down on a stool, calling for a whiskey from the bartender restocking the shelves. Sitting there, I nursed that bloody whisky until it warmed as I rehearsed what I was going to say to her.

  When I couldn’t stand it any longer, when the creep of energy under my skin had my teeth on edge, I tossed down the last of the whisky and went outside for a cigarette. The nicotine cravings had lessened, but old habits were hard to break when I was frustrated. Lola needed to make up her mind one way or another. I had to know if I was chasing ghosts. I tossed the cigarette, crushed it into the ground with my heel and strode toward the bike. She’d fought hard for me when I wouldn’t give her an inch of ground. I’d fight harder to get my woman back. Climbing on the bike, I revved it, letting the back wheel spin out as I turned sharply on the loose gravel and headed toward her house.

  I banged on the front door, and then put my fist to it again. She knew the sound of my bike, so if she didn’t answer soon I’d forget about waiting to be let in.

  The door opened. "Leo, what are you doing back?"

  I advanced on her and she took several steps back, while the door closed behind us. Grasping her waist, I held her locked in my gaze. "Lola, what do you want?"

  Her eyes were huge, shifting between blue and gray. "What are you doing here, Leo?"

  Pacing a tight circle, I scrubbed a hand over my beard. "Less than a week ago, you were wrapped around me. Now, you’re pretending like it never happened. I need to know what you want."

  "I don’t know."

  Each step I took was one she took back, our gazes locked, our breathing in sync until we hit the landing, her back against the wall, my arms trapping her against me. "Sure you do." I nipped at her throat. "You want me to drag you into that room and crawl inside you. You want to feel my hands all over you."

  Her breathing got sharper. "Yes."

  My body itched to do just that. To haul her onto my shoulder and throw her onto the bed, but until she gave me a sign that it would be more than fucking, I wouldn’t move from where we were. "I told you I wouldn’t settle for less than every night."

  "I can’t give you that." She dipped her glance to her hands on my chest.

  "Not yet, maybe. But soon?" I hooked a finger under her chin and lifted her gaze back to mine.

  "Why Leo, why are you pushing this? Why can’t we be happy as we are?" she pleaded, her eyes clouded.

  "Are you happy?" A growl rose in my throat, my chest aching at the question I needed to ask. I counted to five in my head and took a deep breath to steady myself. "Because I’m not, and knowing you’re still thinking about signing those damn papers…"

  "Yes, I have the papers, Leo." The blood drained from her face as she shook her head. "I don’t know what I’m going to do with them. I don’t know whether we can be more than what we are right now."

  Again, her gaze dropped, despite my hold on her jaw. I tilted my head until I got in her line of sight. "We can. We could be so much more if you’d let go."

  "How am I supposed to do that?" Her hands fluttered above my chest while she raised and dropped her shoulders. She plucked at my thin cotton T-shirt. "It’s not like we’re only making choices for ourselves."

  She still used our daughter as an excuse. Yes, I wanted what was best for our girl, but couldn’t Lola see that was her and I, together? "Then tell me, if it was only you and me—"

  "But it isn’t, and I don’t have the answers you want."

  She could fight me on this until she was blue in the face, but the way she settled in my arms, and the longing in her gaze told me I could convince her. Trapping her wrist between my fingers, I dragged her into the room where we’d spent hours together the other night. "I do. I have the answers, sweetheart."

  Stripping off my T-Shirt, I pulled her close, moving her palm over my chest. "You asked me why I got this. And I asked you if it mattered."

  "It doesn’t." She worried that perfect pout of hers.

  "I think it does."

  "Then why, Leo? Did you hate me so much you had to ink your chest to remind you every damn day?"

  "No, sweetheart. I inked you over my heart, because you took it with you. You shocked the hell out of me, turning up out of the blue and reminded me of all the pain I went through when I lost you, but that didn’t change the fact you still held me captive."

  "All the pretty words." Under the veil of her hair, her mouth tugged up at the corners.

  "True words, Lola. Maybe I got lost in the haze of the pain and anger your disappearance caused, but I’m here now and I’m not going anywhere."

  "For now."

  "No, for the rest of our lives. You’ll work it out soon." I cupped her cheek, brushed my thumb over her jaw. "Let me remind you of how good we are together."

  Her fingers curled in the smatter of hair in the center of my chest as I took her mouth, devouring her slowly, and savoring her sweet, coffee infused taste. Darting her tongue over mine, she gave in to me, and a groan rumbled through my chest at the sensual intimacy of her surrender. The fight that had filled our fucking was replaced with desperation. Tearing at each other, clothes flew as our feverish fingers popped buttons and snaps. Black lace shredded between my fingers, her arousal coating them.

  Gripping her ass, I hauled her into my arms. "I’ll fight to have you in my arms, in my bed, Lola."

  Her lips covered mine, her arms strangling me as she flicked her tongue into my mouth and seated herself above the head of my cock. It jerked, pulsed with the craving to sink into her already. The heat of her made a groan rumble through my chest, and she pushed her tongue further into my mouth. We tangled a fast and frenzied dance of lips, tongues, and teeth.

  The wall was right behind me and it would have been easy to spin around and lean her against it while I slipped inside her, but I wanted to give her more than that. I wanted to pull her apart over and over again. Crossing the room, I pushed her down on the bed and spread her legs apart while she gripped the corded muscle of my shoulders. Her thighs were soaked with her arousal, the scent of her a heady thing that drew me in. I plunged fingers between her slick pussy lips and felt her squirm beneath me, her hips bucking to pull them deeper. Firm flesh swollen and ripe reacted to my touch, and a shudder surged through her when I brushed my thumb over her clit. "I love your fucking pussy, sweetheart, and
the way you’re always so eager for me to be inside you."

  Slow circles over the kernel of her nerves while I kept up the rhythm of my fingers inside her had her keening and her hips undulating. She rose and dipped beneath my fingers. I wanted to be able to touch her like this every day and every night, hell, whenever I wanted, not only when the craving got too much that we could no longer hold back. Back arching off the bed, she fell apart in my hands. Dragging it out, I watched her face tighten, and her eyes squeeze shut as her lips parted, before her entire body relaxed. Her sex face was something I would never get over.

  She opened her eyes and rose up on her elbows, a slight smile playing around her lips, her chest rising and falling with short shallow breaths. The bed tempted me, made me want to settle beside her, pull her on top of me and watch her face all over again. Taking my hand, she threaded our fingers together and pulled me down on top of her. "Lay here with me for just a minute."

  "Are you spent?" I brushed the hair from her face and gazed into her eyes.

  "Hardly." Her grin was instantaneous, lighting me up inside. "But, we have all night and more."

  I cupped her face in my palms. "Every damn day."

  "We have time." She pulled her knees up to cradle my hips, holding me in an intimate embrace.

  Breathing synchronized, bodies melded together, she ran her hands down my back, leaving a trail of ecstasy beneath my skin. A purr filled my chest, rolled around in my throat, while she flattened her palms against my hips and rose up to take me inside her. Sliding into her was a slow dance of exquisite torture. The heat of her inner walls as they worked to take me deeper flooded my senses.

  I dipped down to kiss her, soft tongue thrusts and the salty sweetness of the connection between us kept me grounded when all I wanted to do was surge forward, hammer into her willing pussy, and find release. A quick roll had her on top of me, her knees digging into the mattress while she moved her hips with fluid grace. Palms pressed to my chest, she straddled me, pulling me deeper into her tight core, rising and falling on my length. The sweet slap of her ass against my tight balls had me breathing faster. Our gazes connected and locked while she rode me. Her whimpers filled the silence between us, and in my chest, a roar took over. This was my girl, my wife, my always. Gripping her hips, I arched up to taste the salt on her supple flesh, and felt her shudder as I dragged a dusky nipple between my teeth. Breath hitched, her face tensed, and then she was lost in her orgasm, lost in the motion that kept her sliding up and down my cock. Her body crumpled forward as she cried out, and I thrust into her harder, sustaining the orgasm and finding my own. My cock pulsed as I released inside her, holding her to me even after we were done.

  Afterward, I rolled us onto our side, and pulled her tight against me. Watching her fall asleep in my arms made my chest tighten, a lump form in my throat. Brushing the hair from her face, I rested my nose against hers. This was home. I didn’t know how I could have ever doubted that.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Lola

  "Coffee?" Leo asked as he lifted me onto the counter.

  "Always. I’d marry coffee if I could."

  "Well, you married me, and I think I remember the clause." He winked and leaned in to nibble my lips.

  I swung my heels against the cupboard doors while he poured fresh coffee into mugs and doctored it with sugar. Thank small mercies for automatic coffee machines. He pressed a cup into my hands and centered himself between my legs, wrapping them around him as we both sipped our coffee.

  Between each sip, he layered kisses on the spot between shoulder and neck where my collar left the skin bare. "I want to take you back to bed, and spend all morning remembering your body."

  Putting my empty cup down, I stared over his shoulder at the coffee maker, already wanting my second for the morning. "We can’t. Tia’s going to be up soon. I’m not ready to drag her into this."

  Grasping my chin in his fingers, he held my gaze. "Sweetheart, we’re going to have to tell her her parents are back together."

  "I know." I dipped my shoulders. "But not yet. I'm not comfortable telling her until we can see if this will work out. We don't have a good track record, Leo."

  "As long as you’re not second guessing." Eyes narrowed, his fingers tensed on my jaw.

  "I’m being responsible."

  The door opened and we jumped apart as Mellie stepped into the kitchen. I crossed my legs and gripped the edge of the counter, while she scowled at both of us. "Morning."

  "Morning, Sis. Coffee?" Jumping down off the counter, I went to get another mug.

  Her gaze shot daggers at Leo, while I doctored her cup, and I cringed inwardly at the intensity of her dislike. "Leo, what are you doing here?"

  Pressing a kiss to my cheek, he took his cup to the sink. "I’m going to shower."

  I nodded. I wasn’t surprised he’d want out of the kitchen. The tension was thick, smothering the easiness of earlier moments. Left alone with Mellie, I finished fixing the coffee and handed her one, while I tried to work out what to say.

  "What is he doing here?" Mellie cocked her hip and an eyebrow at the same time.

  "I asked him to stay." Running my finger along the counter, I studied it. Of course, I knew I wouldn’t find dirt. It took her a surprisingly long time to come back at me.

  "Of course you did," she sniped. "So, are you two getting back together?"

  "I don’t know." Shaking my head, I took a seat, studying my almost empty coffee cup. I couldn't remember drinking it. "How come you’re here so early?"

  "I wanted to take my niece out for the day. I haven’t had much chance to spend time with her recently. But, seriously, what are you doing with him?" Bracing her palms on the counter, she leaned over me, her head cocked toward the stairs.

  I mulled over what to say to her while I gulped down the dregs in my cup. The tick of the clock filled the silence.

  "Do you even have an answer?" She tossed her hands in the air.

  "Honestly, Mellie, I don’t know. He wants to get back together, but what if we end up in a worse place than we are now?" I picked at invisible crumbs on the countertop.

  "I can’t believe you’re even thinking about it."

  I could handle Mellie’s opinion and couldn’t blame her for being offside when it came to men and me, but he wasn’t like those boys I had dated as a teenager. "Why do you say that?"

  "He knew about Brady, right?"

  "Yes."

  "How can you forgive him for leaving you to rot?"

  "He didn’t. He searched for me." I jumped out of the chair and went to get more coffee.

  "Not hard enough, Lolly." She stepped in front of me, halting me in my tracks. "No, he left you, and when you’re finally free he wants to punish you for disappearing?"

  "It’s not black and white, Mellie." I stepped around her.

  "Did he hurt you?" Gripping my wrists tightly, she brought my palms up between us and stared me down. "Did he fucking hurt you?"

  "It was an accident."

  "So tell me how it happened. You’ve been doing pole dancing for years. You’re a professional, so how come you didn’t stop it from happening? You must have known…"

  Flinging my hand, she released me and paced the length of the counter. "Would you even call it consensual?"

  "Mellie," I screeched. "Shut up. It wasn’t like that."

  "Of course it wasn’t, because you were always unable to say no." She grabbed the papers I’d tucked away at the back of the mail file, opened but unsigned and pushed them across the counter. "Sign them. Finish this. You’ll be better off without—"

  Leo entered the room. His dark hair beaded with water from the shower. "Lola, is what your sister’s saying…" He glanced from me to Mellie and down to the papers in front of me. "What’s going on?" Hands clenched by his sides, his shoulders hunched as his lips formed a tight line. "You’re actually going to do this?"

  "I—"

  Mellie advanced on him. "I won’t let Lola allow you to run a
ll over her. I don’t care if you’re used to getting whatever you want. It isn’t going to happen this time. You don’t deserve her."

  "I don’t." He shuffled his hand through his hair. "And, I don’t know if she can forgive me, but I’m damn well going to try and be worth it."

  "Leo, I don’t need—"

  Mellie darted a glance over her shoulder at me and back at him. "She’s going to sign those papers. It’s bad enough you're Tia’s father. Lola doesn’t need you pushing her into a relationship that isn’t what she wants."

  Unable to get a word in edgewise, I sat there with my mouth gaping.

  Leo’s fist hit the countertop, and he turned on his heel and stalked out. Jumping from the stool, I scrambled after him. The back door banging as it shut behind me. From inside I heard Mike’s voice boom as he entered the kitchen, too. "Melanie Albrict, don’t be such a fucking bitch."

  "He doesn’t deserve her."

  "For fuck sake, Hurricane, they love each other. Don’t you think that maybe…"

  I didn’t have time to ponder the nickname I’d never heard Mike use before, but it certainly seemed fitting. I sprinted after Leo. There’d be time to ask where ‘hurricane’ had come from later.

  Leo was already straddling his bike as I rounded the corner of the house. "Don't go."

  He stopped with his helmet lifted to his chest, and I skidded to a halt beside him. "I don’t want you to leave."

  Resting the helmet on his lap, he pulled me in and cupped my cheek. "I have to."

  "This is how this plays out? Life pulls us apart and one of us always stays behind." Tears burned behind my eyes. "I knew it wouldn’t change."

  "Sweetheart, don’t cry. I’m not leaving you."

  "Then stay."

  "I can’t. I have to go...but I’ll be back. I’m always coming back to you."

  "Stay." I cupped the hand he held to my cheek.

  He shook his head. "If I stay now, I’ll throttle that sister of yours."

  "She’s out of line."

  "She worries about you, and she’s not wrong."